Honesty

So I'm just gonna say it.. I've been in a funk lately. I know it's the result of a lot of things going on, but I'm having a hard time shaking it! It's frustrating for me to be a social worker and in a counselor role and think "Dang I could use some counseling!" I know there is nothing wrong with asking for help and believe that some of the most effective counselors and social workers are in therapy themselves.. however.

As social workers we are called to help people and it can be annoying when we are the ones that need help and we can't fix it ourselves. The sometimes crazier thing is knowing what you should be doing and not doing it. Definitely a learning experience and one that provides some perspective into our client's lives... ya know that empathy thing.

Last week I led a group on attitudes and beliefs and it looked into irrational thinking and our internal critic. One of the discussion questions was something to the effect of "How would you tell someone else that their thinking on X topic was irrational?" Basically getting to the point that it is much easier for us to tell others how to fix something than for us to see the solution to our own problem - even if it is the same problem! Not mind blowing, or a new idea, certainly. The "plank in your own eye" bible verse comes to mind..

When my clients answer a question I sometimes follow up with "So - taking that a step further..." to gather more information and to help them connect the dots on what they've just identified. Asking my own self this, I find myself thinking.. 1) I've identified a problem. 2) I know many different solutions and techniques for said problem. 3) I'm choosing not to do any of these solutions. 4) Therefore I'm choosing to live with the problem and suffer.

Hmm. How about them apples!

One of my coworkers identifies this cycle in his groups - "I do this --> This Happens --> I suffer." And "I don't do this --> That doesn't happen --> I don't suffer."

To me the use of the word suffer is so thought provoking. I usually think of suffering in terms of someone who is dealing with a terrible amount that I can hardly fathom. To picture myself in this cycle and think that I may be getting in the way of my own happiness by not doing something more productive is.. well.. insanity.

And on that note I'm going to make myself do some yoga before the day is over. Cheers!